Okay, okay so I know 2013 is still underway, but I was reading some journal entries aloud to Sienna earlier while she dozed on my left arm and felt like sharing these small peaks into what what going on at the time. I read each entry as if I was telling a story, and I was. A story of how life has changed in such a short amount of time. A story of feelings and emotions that I never thought were possible. A story of how we came to this present moment.
Reading old journal entries is like looking through photographs. They offer a glimpse into life at that particular moment, sometimes with more clarity than any picture can.
It’s the eve of 2013, and today has been a great day. Nan accompanied me to my 8am appointment at West Shore and I was allowing myself to remain calm and think positive.
Until Maureen had the ultrasound wand in hand and ultra-concentrated look on her face. I think I held my breath at that point.
“Baby with a heartbeat.”
And I exhaled. A very happy, contented sigh of relief. Nan’s eyes (and mine) welled up as Maureen turned the ultrasound screen towards my line of vision. The little kidney bean sized, pixelated blip on the screen that flashed ever so slightly, indicating an active heartbeat, both amused and comforted me. It was exactly what I needed. It was what we all needed.
Sharing the news of my pregnancy with mom, grandma, and the rest of our family and friends was such a nice experience. I thanked technology for the ability to Face Time with cousins and an aunt in uncle in both Maine and Massachusetts. And even the crazy world of Facebook for allowing us to share our positive news with even more people. The outpouring of support was tremendous.
Today I got that extra little reassurance that this is a blessing, and I’m exactly where I need to be. Evan is too. We all are.
Life is good. Life is great.
Happy New Year!